For weeks and weeks I've been dreading for this. College day.

Sometimes when you expect alot out of something, you usually get really hit by reality and tumble back, hitting hard on the ground.
I don't know why am I feeling this way. Its like, when I'm in college, everything seems fine. Just making new friends, talking about common interests, and hanging out for lunch. But once I reach home, I just suddenly get this stupid depression shit that makes me so upset and so literally lifeless. Its like, all I can think about is "what if i'll have to spend tmr's break alone?" "what if i gotta roam the college alone?" "what if i'm the dumbest in the class and no one likes me?". Stupid complicated mind.

I know i shouldn't be complaining about my life, since its already good enough that i have my friends with me. I'm not complaining, I'm just trying to figure out why I'm always so upset when I get home. JAN, geez, stop being such a loser ==

Maan, thinking about the work thats gonna be pilled up just adds to my depression state. In a way, I guess it'll take my mind off things? But it still sucks :( I think, and this time, I'm pretty sure, that my class is filled with really smart ppl! Like, I'm gonna be bottom rock :( D.I.E.


I missssss you!!