I dont know what I'm feeling now. Is this anger? Or am I upset? Sometimes I wonder, is this all even worth it? I was once strong at heart. Once confident in whatever I'm doing. But not anymore. I'm doubting myself now. Asking myself over and over again, when did I start becoming like this? When did I start becoming so annoying, aggravating everyone. Asking for so much. It's as if other people dont have their own problems to deal with already. I dont remember myself being so weak. I should've known that this would happen since the beginning of the year. I keep telling myself, "you can handle this". But the truth is, I cant. I was living in denial all this while, because I know that if I were to admit the truth, I would not be able to handle it. And when I finally admitted it, the impact was far worse than I imagined. Urgh! I hate myself for being like this. So fragile. So weak. This really sucks. But I cant do anything about it. I cant change the past to heal the future. People say, there's no point crying over spilt milk. But words are only words. Harder done than said. You must be thinking; "OhmyGawd. Can she get over this already ar?". I just need someone to tell it all to. Someone that I can turn to in times of need. But I cant trust anyone anymore. Not even myself. Everyone is so caught up with their lives and I wouldn't wanna be an annoyance anymore. There's actually soo many things that I wanna tell you. So many things that I wanna let you know. But the timing is always wrong. And I don't have the confidence to deal with the consequences. I guess, keeping it all to myself will be the best for everyone. Soo, blogspot, you're officially my best friend.